It is very hard to confront people if you want to tell them that what they are doing is not good anymore. Much more if they are older than you, not well-educated and has a spirit of poverty. Yung tipo ba na you have to think of right words to say in order for them not to be offended.
Ganito kasi ang story...
Way back, Manang complained that she has a backache. So in order for her to be relieved, I offered her to use my muscular balm - something like a Tiger Balm (Note that this muscular balm was given to me by my mom since I usually suffer from a migraine attack). After she used it, I forgot to keep it in our room.
I then noticed that she kept on using it every night. So in order to save the balm from total depletion, I immediately kept it inside my cabinet.
One time, she used the balm without my permission and just said that one of my twins got it from the cabinet and opened it. Hay naku, ano ako tanga (excuse me for the word), as if naman mabubuksan yun ng 1 year old eh tightly sealed yun. Nagkibit balikat na lang ako para walang gulo. There was a time also na di na siya nakatiis at hinihiram sa akin yung balm. Eh napapansin ko na napapadalas and ang term niya is "hiram." So I told to myself na if manghiram ulit paringgan ko na lang muna at baka sakaling tamaan. So dumating yung point na nanghiram ulit. So I told her, "Manang, hindi yan hinihiram kasi ang hiram naibabalik, so hingi yan since nauubos." I thought nagets niya ang ibig kong sabihin. But NO! Madalas pa rin humihingi at madalas hindi sinasauli at ako pa ang kumukuha para itago ulit ito.
The other day, nagcomplain na masakit ang kanyang balakang at nagsabi na magpapahilot siya. Nung time na magpapahilot siya, nanghingi ulit and hindi sinauli. Eh that time nagkataon na masakit ang ankles and tuhod ko so I need to use it also. So kinuha ko sa room niya and to my surprise when I opened the jar, paubos na. I told to myself na hindi na tama yun dahil siya lang ang nakaubos and ako na may may-ari, twice ko pa lang nagamit yun.
I know na mura lang yun and it's just a small thing. Pero for me, hindi na tama yun. Hindi naman ako madamot pero wag naman sana sagad sagarin. In simple terms, huwag naman abusuhin. I know na pwede ko rin naman ibigay na lang yun, but bigay yun ng mom ko eh and she bought it pa from China. I told my hubby about it and asked him if it's right to tell Manang na since madalas na kailangan niya, bumili na lang siya. He told me na it is alright to tell Manang about it and for her to know her limitations na rin.
So this morning, I kinausap ko si Manang ng mahinahon at may konting lambing.
Me: Manang, may sasabihin ako sa iyo.
Manang: Ano yun?
Me: Manang, hindi naman sa pagiging madamot ha, kasi yung balm napansin ko paubos na and ikaw lang ang gumagamit. Ok lang ba na since kailangan mo rin, bumili ka na lang ng pansarili mo?
Manang: (seems offended) O sige, bibili na lang ako. Bigay mo na lang sa akin yun and bibilhan kita ng bago.
Hindi na lang ako kumibo at ayaw ko na rin kasi ng argumento. Hindi ko naman hinihiling na palitan niya yung balm ko. Eh mapride chicken siya, so bahala siya. Siya naman ang mahihirapan at hindi ako. Ramdam na ramdam ko talaga na masama ang loob niya dahil nag-iba ang kanyang aura. Masyadong big deal sa kanya yun. Sa kin lang, ako pa ang napasama at feeling ko na maramot ako. Alam niyo yung ganong feeling? So I called my hubby and told him na parang sumama ang loob ni Manang dahil hindi nagkikikibo. He told me na wala namang masama sa ginawa ko and huwag ko na lang pansinin. He even reminded me that familiarity breeds contempt.
Buhay nga naman oh, parang life! Bakit ba ganun, pupuna ka lang para maiwasto ang tama tapos bandang huli ikaw pa ang papalabasin na masama?
Kayo, how do you handle this kind of situation?
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